So I've been inspired to start my own blog. This has nothing to do with the drunken sentimental ramblings I put on the adolescent playground known as 'MySpace'. I think starting a 'real' blog will make me feel more intelligent, as long as it has superb spell checking.
To answer a question that inevitably will be asked repeatedly, why 'Anglo-sized dementia'?
Well, since I moved to Arizona, I have been called 'Anglo' which is what white people are in the southwest. Anglo-sized is a play on Anglicized, which means to make culture, language and ism's fit into the English language. Even my last name, which was at some point unnecessarily long and unpronounceable, was in the last 200 years Anglicized from Welsh which made it easier for those stupid soccer playing limey bastards to pronounce as they beat Welsh children for speaking Welsh in Welsh schools.
And dementia? Well, let's just say with my random comments and brutal sense of humor I've made more enemies than friends.
So, now I guess I'll get onto my first post.
So I recently moved down to Arizona from Michigan and it is a world of difference. New traffic laws, no bottle refunds and whites are the minority.
No precipitation for 360 days of the year, blowing sand, no little chipmunks stealing from bird feeders.
Here is a little sample of how things are different-
A typical conversation piece from a coworker at Best Buy Lansing: 'My uncle Jerry owns a timeshare in Pentwater'
A typical conversation piece from a coworker in Yuma Best Buy- 'My uncle Rico got arrested for stealing tailgates'
Also I have noticed that groups of Mexicans sit on a car and drink, while groups of Mexicans in cars drive by the stationary Mexicans real slow and have staring contests. At times like these I wish I had telepathic abilities because I would learn how to threaten and cuss in Spanish. And learn how to plan to steal rims. But I don't think anyone would do anything bad down here because theres an awful lot of religious folks down here. In fact, I've met 4 people named Jesus.
Well, it's damn near my bedtime so I'm going to unceremoniously wrap this up.
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4 comments:
What the shit is it about not being able to buy pitchers of beer in AZ? Any direct connection to the gun carrying laws?
I don't know man... I hear the gun laws here are among the most lenient but I don't think it has anything to do with the liquor laws.
There are similar liquor restrictions in Michigan, IE at least five people on a bucket at Crunchies.
I think, ultimately, that the Surgeon General is taken more seriously down here and thus the stricter limitations. There's no smoking in public, no drinking in public and the cops do not fuck around whatsoever with alcohol related crimes.
Open Intox in michigan gets you a ticket. It gets you jail down here.
Everyone has stupid liquor laws. In Texas, you can serve alcohol at "private clubs" in dry counties. So all the food joints got together, declared themselves one big "private club" and started serving booze. Check it out:
http://www.unicardsystems.com/
You "join" the club by ordering a drink.
You have to be a member in Utah as well.. a dues paying member. It's nothing more than paying a cover charge thats kicked back to the state.
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